


Impulses

by pamcakes336



Category: The Queen's Gambit (TV)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Drug Abuse, Explicit Language, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-17 13:35:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28600791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pamcakes336/pseuds/pamcakes336
Summary: “She never could have done it without your help. Thanks for calling her back.”Benny rolled his eyes, “Yes she could have. She just needed reminding that she could.”
Relationships: Beth Harmon/Benny Watts
Comments: 68
Kudos: 259
Collections: Beth and Benny (The Queen's Gambit)





	1. Chapter 1

It’d been three days since the phone call to Moscow. Benny and the rest of the boys had squeezed into his cold and small apartment, various boards and chess pieces were scattered across the living room; until the early hours of the morning each game was tested with every possible move Beth could make against The Russian. He had clutched the phone so tightly like his life depended on it, and somehow it did. He didn’t even bother to say hello or ask how she was doing when she picked up, a flush of determination pinched at his skin as he coached her as if it would make up for their broken friendship.

He should have been there with her. He also should have never slept with her.

Benny Watts sat on his couch, reading the New York Times when his phone rang. It was Townes.

“Did you see Harmon’s article on the Times?” He asked after a while.

“I’m looking at it right now,” Benny said, glancing at the paper.  
She wore a white fur coat and matching hat, she wasn’t smiling but he knew that look in her eyes, she was glowing from the inside.

“She never could have done it without your help. Thanks for calling her back.”

Benny rolled his eyes, “Yes she could have. She just needed reminding that she could.”

“You should tell her that when she gets back.” Townes says, “She really listens to you, takes everything you say to heart.”

“When is she heading back?”

“I think she said her flight lands at around midnight tonight in Louisville.”

Benny glances at his clock; it was 11:30 am; If he left now he could make it there just past midnight. Benny frowned, what was the point though? Just because he helped her against Borgrov doesn’t mean that everything was fixed. Beth still loved her fucking booze and drama, way more than him which she has proven time and time again. He could just give her a call, or better yet wait for her to call him; why put in the effort when he knew he was never going to receive it back.

Benny said goodbye to Townes and hung up the phone. His eyes sweep back at Beth’s picture, her eyes were still piercing into him.

* * *

He arrived in front of her house just after midnight, getting the address from Harry Beltik when he stopped at a gas station earlier. Beth wasn’t home yet. The little blue house looked empty and gray; the porch was littered with newspapers and dried autumn leaves from the trees, the mailbox was overstuffed with letters and the garden was turned into mulch. It was like no one had lived there for months.

At first, he was worried that Townes was wrong, that Beth might have stayed back another day in Russia or flown to another country for a last-minute tournament. But he decided to wait it out, if Beth didn’t show up by 2:00 he could check into a motel for the night, drive back to New York in the morning and forget the whole thing. 

Benny drummed his fingers on his steering wheel, adrenaline and anxiety pumping through his veins. He normally wasn’t like this; everything he did, even with gambling, was planned out with a clear and thought out plan. But ever since he met Beth all his choices started to become impulsive and overtaken with emotion, especially if they involved her. 

He didn’t like it. He hated that she could do that to him. But he secretly hoped that he had the same effect on her.

A yellow cab pulled up the driveway, the tires cracking against gravel interrupted the silence of the night. Beth came out holding a little yellow suitcase. Despite a 13 hour flight she was dressed sharply, with a black coat that fell just past her thighs, matching gloves, and beret. Her lips were painted a dark crimson red. 

Benny flicked his eyes away from her for a second. He never really noticed the way Beth dressed; it was really her chess skills that caught his attention. And it was the way she spoke and thought that really intrigued him. But now he couldn’t deny that she was a looker too. Shit. Was she always this way? Benny waited for the cab to drive away before he got out. 

“Why hello Beth Harmon,” He said.

Beth almost dropped her keys at the sound of his voice.

“Benny?” Her dark eyes widening as she took him in.

God, he really did miss her.

“What’re you doing here?” She asked.

That was a good question Benny thought. What was he doing here, what was he expecting? Was he expecting her to run into his arms, to announce that alcohol did nothing for her anymore? That she missed him just as much as he missed her? No. So what made him drive 13 hours from New York to Kentucky? What was he doing here again? 

“I just…I came to say hello” he shrugged, “and congratulations.”

Beth wrinkled her brows together, shook her head in disbelief, and scoffed. He was worried she was angry, that she didn't want to see him but then she softened, bit her lower lip, and smiled, relief pouring into her eyes.

“Hello, Benny Watts.”


	2. Chapter 2

The house was a mess. Upon stepping into the room a cloud of dust and the sweet sticky scent of alcohol wafted into Benny’s nostrils. Empty liquor bottles were littered on every surface of the house, on the piano, kitchen counter, and coffee table. Books were scattered among the floor and dust coated the maple wood furniture like a blanket, with cobwebs dangling from their edges. Beneath it all, it was probably a nice home at one point.

He knew Beth was a drunk, he knew it the moment she took a sip of her first beer when they had gone to the bar together after the U.S. Championships.

But he didn’t think it was like this.

Beth was clearly embarrassed, her face turning as red as her hair. She quickly went to the piano and started grabbing empty beer cans and wine bottles.

“I’m so sorry about the mess,” she said, “I was in a bit of a rush before heading to Moscow...”  
The bottles clanged together and threatened to spill out as she piled them into her arms. It was too jarring to see her like this. This wasn't like her at all, or maybe it was.

“Hey,” Benny said as he placed a hand on her elbow, “Hey.”

Beth stopped, her shoulders rising and dropping with every breath she took. She didn’t dare look at him right now.

“It’s been a long day and an even longer week. Why don’t you just go and freshen’ up or something.”

Beth nodded but didn’t look at him. She poured the bottles and cans on the piano, the clanging filling up the awkward silence. Beth turned to go but stopped, “Please, make yourself at home.”

“You wouldn’t happen to have an air mattress would you?”

Beth gave him a small smile, “If I did you’d be living on it.”

Benny looked around the room as Beth disappeared upstairs. He couldn’t have her living like this, hell, he couldn’t live like this even for one night. He may live in a shitty basement suite with concrete floors and leaky windows but even he had his limits.

Benny shrugged off his coat and hat onto the coat stand and got to work. He pulled the bottles and cans into the trash can he found out back, opened the windows to let some fresh air in, and put the discarded books back on the shelves. There were cigarette stubs and ash peppered across the coffee table, he scooped them back into the little blue ashtray. He looked around when he was finished, it wasn’t clean but he could deal with it, and hopefully, Beth could too.

Beth came downstairs a few minutes later, wearing a pair of plaid slacks and a white t-shirt. She looked around at the room; beside the dust and cobwebs, it almost looked like how it used to when it was just her and Mrs. Wheatley, blue and feminine. It hadn’t looked like that in months.

Benny sat on the loveseat watching a rerun of _My Three Sons_ , a glass of water resting in his hand. His eyes were red, with noticeable bags under his eyes. Beth suddenly realized he might have had a long week too.

“Are you hungry?” She asked, “I don’t think I have much but eggs and some milk.”

“Sure.”

They ate in silence in front of the television set, the chorus of audience laughter and corny dialogue being the soundtrack for the night. Benny didn’t know where he was supposed to be sleeping tonight, but Beth hadn’t brought it up so neither did he. The drive was starting to get him, his limbs ached and his eyes would unfocus as he watched the screen. It was 3:30 am and his body was begging for sleep.

“Thank you for cleaning up,” Beth said suddenly “You really didn’t have to do that.”

Benny shrugged, not looking at her.

“I haven’t drunk since before Moscow.”

He didn’t say anything.

“Or taken any tranquilizers.”

Benny stiffened. His body now alert and his mind awake. Tranquilizers? When did that start?

“What are you talking about?” He was looking at her now.

Beth shrugged, “I used to take them before matches. I’ve had them since I was at Methuen.”

This woman was unhinged, he thought. He ran a hand through his hair and stared at the white carpeted floor. There was cigarette ash stuck between the cotton.

“Why are you telling me this?” He asked.

Beth picked at a loose thread on one of the blue throw pillows. “I don’t know.”

They stayed silent for a moment, the ending song and credits scrolling down the screen.

“I should go to bed,” Beth said. She picked up the dirty dishes and headed to the kitchen. Benny stayed on the couch, not really knowing what to do. What was he supposed to do with this? 

“Good night Benny.”

“Beth, wait.” He stood up, “Congratulations. Really. I knew you could beat Borgov.”

Beth cast her eyes down, fluffy dark lashes shadowing her cheeks. “I really couldn’t have done it without you. Or Harry. Or everyone else.”

“Yes, yes you could have.” He said. 

Beth peered up at him, her doe brown eyes filled with sincerity. He wanted to kiss her, he wanted to kiss her so badly. He wanted to cup her face in his hands and kiss her until he couldn’t think anymore. But he restrained himself.

“Good night Beth.”

* * *

Beth captured his black pawn and he castled. The pair had slept in until 12 in the afternoon. Benny had slept on the couch, the television set still playing as he passed out. They had more eggs and coffee for breakfast.

He suggested they play a few rounds of chess, telling her about an upcoming tournament he was invited to in London next month. Beth brought out a dining chair and small stool outside so they could play on the porch. The afternoon was calm, the blue sky was dotted with little white clouds and the trees were beginning to sprout fresh leaves announcing the early arrival of Summer.

As the day went by, the tension and awkwardness began to dissipate slowly. The pair laughed and teased each other, the coffee cups piled high on the sink, and they played chess match after chess match after chess match. It was almost like it had been back in New York.

Almost.

“What should we have for dinner tonight?” Beth asked.

Benny took a quick drag from his cigarette, “I don’t know,” he said, “what’s good around here?” She attacked one of his pawns.

“We could order in, there’s a good Chinese restaurant up on main street.”

Benny thought for a second and moved his King to D4.

“We should go out instead,” he said.

Beth peered up at him, her right eyebrow arched up.

“We barely went out in New York, we should take advantage of the free time we have right now before tournament season starts up again,” Benny explained, his eyes transfixed onto the board.

Beth wondered if he did this on purpose, say something that would cause a stir in her just for him to anchor her down. Or maybe it was just her, she had a habit of taking his words the wrong way and mixing them into something they weren’t. It wasn’t fair sometimes.

She looked back down at the game, hands cupped under her chin.

“There’s a diner just up the road, we could go there,” she said.

Benny leaned forward so he was on his elbows, their heads just inches apart.

“Sounds terrific,” Benny said, but it didn’t sound like a positive phrase, it sounded more like a challenge.

* * *

The diner was empty except for two people. It was small but cozy, with fairy lights hanging from the roof rim of the restaurant giving it a nice glow. Pictures of Hollywood stars and film posters covered the walls, from Steve Mcqueen to Audrey Hepburn. A Dean Martin song was playing quietly on the jukebox.

Beth ordered herself a coke with a burger and fries, and Benny got himself pancakes with maple syrup.

“That’s not exactly dinner,” Beth teased as the waitress set their meals in front of them.

He shrugged, “I had a craving.”

Benny glanced around the room, “Did you always come here when you were younger?”

“Only with Mrs. Wheatley when she felt well enough.” Beth said between sips of her coke, “I didn’t really go out much as a teenager.”

Benny grinned, “I would have loved to have seen you as a high schooler.”

“Why?” Beth snorted.

“Because you probably stood out like a sore thumb. Remember your article on Life?”

Beth narrowed her eyes, of course she did as if she could forget. On the first day at Las Vegas, he had brought up the article and immediately pointed out a flaw she made in her game with Harry.

“Vaguely.” She said.

“They described you as ‘ _a young, unsmiling girl with brown eyes…_ ’ ***** ”

“You remember that?”

“Alright, get off your high horse” Benny said quickly, “I was studying for our match in Las Vegas.”

Beth chuckled lightly. “Anyway, I hated that article.” she said, “They barely acknowledged my gaming, they just went on and on about me being a girl… and I hated that photo of me.” 

“Your hair’s gotten longer, it looks good,” he said. 

Beth couldn’t help herself, “Do you still like my hair?” 

Benny turned away trying to suppress a smile but failing miserably. A blush forming on his cheeks. They were both thinking about that night in New York. 

“I miss New York,” Beth said slowly, twirling her straw around her coke glass.

Benny leaned forward in his seat as casually as he could, his elbows resting on the table. “You should come visit soon… it’s really nice at Christmas time.” 

They peered up into each other's eyes, daring the other to look away first. It wouldn’t be me this time, Benny thought. 

The diner doors suddenly swung open, breaking the spell. A large group of people came in hurriedly, they were laughing and chattering amongst themselves. They made their way to the back of the booths, taking up two tables.

“Beth! Benny!” One of them suddenly shouted. 

Benny turned around, annoyed at the interruption but then saw that it was Harry Beltik. 

“Beth, when did you get back?” Harry asked. 

“Last night.” she said, “I was going to give you a call this week. Thank you so much for Moscow.” 

“Don’t mention it. It was Benny’s idea to round us all up anyway.” 

Beth caught Benny’s eye but he quickly looked down at his half-eaten pancakes. 

“What are you doing here?” Benny asked. 

“We just finished our midterms at the University.” Harry said, “We’re just grabbing a bite to eat and then heading over to the club to celebrate. You two should come!” 

Benny hesitated. A club? Benny didn’t dance, and clubs weren’t really his scene. He’s been to plenty in New York, but only to drink and meet girls. A club was the last thing he wanted to do right now. He was also worried about Beth, a club would be dangerous territory for her. 

“I’ve never been to a club before, it sounds like fun,” Beth said. 

Benny shot a glance at her, but she ignored it. This would not end well, Benny thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the positive comments and kudos on my last chapter! They really inspired me to make this chapter longer :)  
> I promise 'that scene' will come soon, but I wanna do Beth and Benny some justice before their night of passion, they deserve it!
> 
> *a direct quote from The Queen's Gambit novel by Walter Tevis, ch 5. p. 94


	3. Chapter 3

“What do you think you’re doing?” Benny whispered.

The sun had set over Lexington, the sky was in shades of black and blues as it settled into the night. The street lights glowed casting long shadows on the sidewalk. The group walked down the street, cheering and laughing as they drew nearer to the club. Harry’s friends were a lively bunch, not caring at the slightest that Benny and Beth played chess professionally. They were mostly interested in their traveling and winnings. Benny scarcely joined any conversation, he was too busy trying to catch Beth’s eye. And Beth avoided his looks like the plague. With every step Benny took, anxiety festered deep in his stomach.

He wasn’t responsible for Beth, he knew that, and he also knew Beth would never let him be. Even when he was coaching her back in New York, she was resistant to the idea. Beth was her own person, she was strong and independent, that was one of the reasons he liked her so much. But he couldn’t help but feel protective of her. The scene of Beth pilling empty bottles in her arms was still etched in his mind, she had looked so broken and he never wanted to see her like that ever again.

“Beth, are you fucking kidding me?” he whispered to her again.

Beth pulled out a cigarette from her clutch purse and lit it up, “I’m not going to drink Benny.”

“Okay, but why do we have to go to a club?”

“Because it’s like you said, we should take advantage of the offseason,” Beth reasoned, “And besides, I’ve never gone dancing before. I think I’ve only ever danced once my whole life.”

She said it with such seriousness that Benny knew she wasn’t exaggerating. You couldn’t come across an article about Beth Harmon without mentioning her as an orphan child and her tragic upbringing. Benny pinched the bridge of his nose, how was he supposed to argue with that?

Beth let out a puff of smoke through her rouged lips, the light from the street lamps lighting her face up. “I’m not going to drink, I just want to dance, and I don’t need your permission to do that,” she said.

He narrowed his eyes at her. She was right, but didn’t she understand that he was just looking out for her? Benny didn’t say anything and went back to walk next to Harry. Beth took a long drag from her cigarette before flicking it onto the ground.

* * *

The club was in full swing when they arrived. As they walked in, loud music by The Supremes bled through the walls. Young adults decorated in colorful skirts and dress jackets were scattered across the club like pawns on a chessboard, they were dancing, drinking, and yelling, living it up on a Saturday night. Benny stuck out like a sore thumb against the crowd with his black trench coat and his Akubra hat. But he almost preferred it that way. Beth felt the atmosphere intoxicating, the scent of perfume and cigarette smoke filled her lungs. Everyone looked so bright and sensual, like nothing in the world matters except for the music and she wanted to feel that way too.

Some of Harry’s classmates immediately went to the bar to order drinks while others rushed to the dance floor.

A short blonde girl grabbed Beth by the wrist, “Let’s dance!”

Beth hesitated but allowed her to take her. Beth suddenly felt a sense of regret as they made their way to the center of the dance floor. She didn’t even know how to start, it had been a lot easier at Tim’s apartment, she was high and alone then. Now she felt like she was being scrutinized. The blonde girl immediately got in the mood, swinging her hips around like Little Eva. She looked sexy and relaxed, her blonde hair swinging across her face. Beth tried to keep up, but she felt clunky and awkward.

The blonde girl laughed, “You’re thinking too much! Just listen to the music and don’t care about anything else!”

Beth nodded, she closed her eyes and tried to let her body relax. Relax? What even was that word. Beth had never felt relaxed in her entire life unless she swallowed three tranquilizers prior or had a glass of wine. She tried again, swinging her hips around and kicking her feet with the beat of the music. She pushed the little voices in her head aside as best she could; she didn’t think about chess, the house, Mrs. Wheatley, the tranquilizers, alcohol, or even Benny. It was like riding a wave in the pool with Jolene, just letting the current take you. She just let her body move.

“There you go!” The girl said.

Beth opened her eyes and laughed. The girl took Beth’s hand and twirled her around, her dress spinning with her like a hurricane. Beth raised her arms and felt the music pumping in her pulse and being carried through her veins, it felt so good, it was almost like being high.

Benny watched from the bar, a little mesmerized. The only time he ever saw Beth laugh was when she was teasing or beating him over a game of chess. Beth’s hips grinded and swung, her dress bouncing up revealing her long milky thighs. Memories of their first night together flashed through his mind. He could watch her dance all night.

“You want a drink?” Harry asked, interrupting his thoughts.

“No, I’m good.” He said not taking his eyes off Beth.

Harry glanced at where Benny was looking. “Are you two going steady or something?” Harry asked.

Benny scoffed, “No, we’re just friends.” He hoped the darkness of the room masked his blush.

“What brings you to Kentucky then?”

“I have a chess tournament in London next month, she’s coaching me.”

“Ah, I see. Funny how the tables turn, huh?”

Benny nodded and ordered a glass of water from the bartender.

“She’s...she’s doing okay, right?” Harry suddenly asked.

Benny flickered his eyes back to him. “What do you mean?”

Harry shifted in his seat, uncomfortably, and took a sip of his drink. “Nothing, I’m just wondering if she’s doing okay.”

Benny knew there was something more, and put a hand on his shoulder. “Harry, what do you mean?”

Immediately Harry knew that Benny liked Beth, he could tell through the urgency in his voice and the serious look on his face. Harry liked Benny, and he knew that he was a good guy. If something were to happen between him and Beth he had to know what had been going on with her.

“Look this is none of my business but I feel like someone needs to know.” Harry said, “Before the U.S Champions I trained Beth for a little bit at her house, and I went into her bathroom and found tranquilizers.”

Benny released his grip on Harry and slumped back in his seat. Harry knew?

“We both know Beth was hungover during her match with Bolgov in Paris,” Harry continued, “It was evident in the Chess Review article. But when she got back she was a wreck. I tried calling her house, I even went and visited her but she never got back to me. The only time I saw her was at the Kentucky State Champions and she was bombed.”

Benny ran a hand through his face. He knew this, he knew all of this but hearing the words from someone else clenched at his gut.

“I don’t know what’s going on with you and Beth, but I thought you should know,” Harry said.

Benny nodded. He felt sick, he hadn’t drunk or smoked anything but he felt numb. He never should have let Beth convince him to come here. There was alcohol, drugs, and drunk people everywhere, it was only a matter of time before Beth ordered one and killed herself drunk.

Suddenly Beth and the blonde girl came running towards them, holding hands and laughing. Her face was pink from the heat and little spots of sweat dotted her forehead.

“I’m having the best time,” Beth said.

Harry chuckled, masking whatever he was feeling, “I can tell.”

“You should come dance with us.”

“I’m not that good.”

Beth rolled her eyes but laughed, she turned to look at Benny but he just drank his glass of water. Was he still upset that they had come? Beth knew Benny had been watching her dance, she could feel his eyes. She had snuck a quick glance at him too, and he looked like he wanted to devour her and it sent a spark down to her core. But now he felt so distant. It irritated her.

“How are you doing over here Mr. Watts?” she asked.

Benny said nothing, he just tipped his glass towards her. Beth frowned but finished his water.

“Can we leave now?” he asked.

“What do you mean leave? We just got here.”

“Beth, I think we should leave.”

The pair stared at each other, an electric tension pulsing between them. Harry offered the blonde girl a drink to give the two some privacy. As soon as they were out of earshot Beth started.

“What’s your problem?”

“You know what my problem is.”

“I’m not drinking Benny.” She said, crossing her arms over her chest.

“I know, but this is a thin line Beth, and you don’t seem to understand that.”

Beth rolled her eyes and scoffed. It was like Benny wasn’t even paying attention at all. She hadn’t drunk or taken any tranquilizers since before Moscow, which was a week ago, sure, but she’d gone through long periods of time, months in fact, without having a touch of alcohol. Benny has even bared witness to that when she stayed over in New York, didn’t he remember that?

“Why are you doing this right now?” she asked.

“Because Beth! Look, Harry told me what happened in the U.S. Championships.”

“Harry doesn’t know anything.”

“We’re just worried about you.”

“Benny just stop this. You’re not my boyfriend okay? I didn’t ask you to drive here. I didn’t ask you to come and take care of me. Do you think being with you is going to change everything? Do you think I’m going to get sober if we get together? That’s not how it works.”

“I know that, but I can help you deal with this.”

Benny tried to reach for Beth’s hand, but she pulled it away. “I don’t want your help,” she said. “Just leave Benny.”

Beth started to walk back to Harry and his friends when Benny grabbed her wrist. “Why do you fucking keep pushing me away Beth? Why?”

Beth turned and looked him straight in the eyes, “Because you’re just a pawn to me.”

Her words stung into his stomach and he immediately let go of her wrist. Benny scoffed and shook his head in bewilderment. Beth immediately regretted her words the moment they slipped out her lips. Why did she always do this? Why did she always utter the most hurtful words to the people who actually cared about her? She did it to Mr. Shaibel, Mrs. Wheatley, Harry, and even to Jolene. He was right, she did push people away.

Before Beth could say anything Benny pushed past her and went back to Harry.

“Everything okay?” Harry asked.

“I’m leaving. Make sure Beth doesn’t drink and make sure she gets home safely. I’m going home.”

Benny quickly pushed himself past the drunken crowd and out of the club.

* * *

It was late and the stars were peppered across the sky, shining like little diamonds. It was summer warm. Benny took out a cigarette from his back pocket, lit it up, and took a long drag. Then he started to walk down the empty street, back to Beth’s house, alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh, writing the argument scene took forever! I really wanted to do it justice and level-headed as I could, screaming and fighting are not Benny and Beth's style, they're more tension and sarcastic remarks. So I hope I did it justice!
> 
> Thank you again for the comments and kudos, I am super excited about how the story is going. Get ready for the next chapter, it's going to be angsty lol


	4. Chapter 4

Benny thought that the 40-minute walk from the club to Beth’s house would calm him down, but it didn’t. He was furious. His gut felt knotted and twisted, and his mouth was dry. A pawn? He didn’t believe her, he knew he was more than that to Beth. She was just trying to hurt him. But the fact that she wanted to hurt him made his blood boil. What was the point of trying to start some sort of relationship, whether that be a friendship or something more if he was only going to feel bruised in the end? Well, she did it, she pushed him away again and he was out of second chances to give.

As Benny reached the house, he flicked his last cigarette to the ground and crushed it under his boot. What was he doing here? Why did he come here in the first place? He was an idiot to think that what Townes had told him was true. Beth didn’t care about what he thought, all she ever cared about was winning and beating Borgov at the soviet union. Now that she’d succeeded, she didn’t need him anymore. Maybe he was a pawn. The thought ripped into his chest getting him more exasperated.

Benny stormed into the house and started grabbing his clothes, stuffing them into his canvas messenger bag. His skin was pinched with irritation as he scrambled around the living room grabbing his things. He needed to start focusing on things that really mattered to him, the chess tournament in London. He also needed to make rent this month and pay back his phone bill after his long-distance call to Moscow. If he left now he could still make it to the poker game at Hilton’s apartment tomorrow night. He could make enough money and then some in one night easily.

Benny patted his pockets quickly once everything was packed into his bag. He was ready to go. Benny swung his bag over his shoulder and headed towards the door, not looking back.

* * *

Beth felt like she was walking in fog even though the night was as clear as day. She kept shivering, her skin felt numb and pricked with electricity. She couldn’t think straight. Her eyes burned and felt heavy. Were these withdrawal symptoms? Beth didn’t know.

She fucked up.

Why was she such an asshole, especially towards him? All Benny had ever done since the moment they met was help her, well sometimes he did it out of spite but it was never with malicious intent. Not even when he conned her out of speed chess, Benny was the first one to apologize. “ _You’re the best there is,*"_ He had said that right after she had taken his title away. She was furious when they had had to share the championship back in Las Vegas, but he had graciously offered his assistance when he lost his half of it. Benny was cocky, overbearing, a smart ass, and an annoying wannabe pirate but he was good. Benny Watts was a good person. And she fucked it up.

But it wasn’t just Benny that was making her feel so sick. She didn’t know how exhausted she was until tonight. Ever since Mrs. Wheatley had died in Mexico, she hadn't stopped. Beth had kept going to tournament after tournament, practicing and studying chess matches at any free moment that she had. Traveling to different cities and countries, and if she were by herself in a hotel room alcohol and tranquilizers became her friend so she didn’t have to hear herself think or feel. She did anything to push away the darkness that was welling up inside, anything so she didn’t have to face it. Even if it meant hurting others.

She kept her word though , she hadn’t a single sip of alcohol tonight. She hadn’t even had a craving for it, but now she did. Her mouth drooled at the thought of it’s bubbling taste on her lips, but Beth especially yearned for the numbing effect that alcohol gave her. It got her so fucked up she couldn’t feel anymore. That’s what she wanted right now.

Beth climbed up the stairs to her house and through the door. Suddenly her heart slipped into her throat. Benny’s bag was in the hallway.

Benny stood up when he heard the door open. He was prepared to leave as soon as she set her foot through the door but he stopped.

Beth’s eyes were bloodshot, her bottom lip was swollen from her constantly chewing on it. Her body was trembling. His anger dissipated.

“Beth, what happened?”

Beth only stared at him, her doe brown eyes wide. “Harry said you were going back to New York.” She whispered.

“I was... I had to make sure you got home safe.”

Suddenly she crumpled. Beth let out a painful cry and fell onto her knees. Something was cracking inside of her and she couldn’t stop it from pouring out. It was too hard to fight off, and she was too tired to even try. She cried. Her chest was burning painfully in it’s sternum, making it hard to breathe in air. Beth sobbed into her hands, heaving and gasping uncontrollably, every pent up thought and feeling spilled out with every salty tear that dripped onto the floor. She cried for the pain she caused, for the pain that she’s been carrying inside ever since she was a little girl. She cried out for her mother, for her father, for Mr. Shaibel, Mrs. Wheatley, Jolene, and Benny, the fact that she never fit in anywhere, that she was never good enough for herself. For her addiction to harming herself. She cried because that’s all her body could do right now.

Benny quickly rushed to Beth and wrapped his arms around her in a tight embrace, he scooped her up onto his lap and buried his face into her hair. He didn’t say anything, he just let her cry. Beth clutched onto the lapels of his trenchcoat as if they were the only things keeping her steady, her knuckles were turning white from the grasp. She felt terribly cold for some reason and her brain was pounding against her skull. Benny shrugged off his coat and draped it over Beth’s shoulders to stop her from shivering. They stayed like that for a while, holding each other on the living room floor. Both of them not saying a word.

It took about half an hour for Beth to stop crying. Once she did, she got up from Benny’s arms and grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen, gulping down the full glass in one sitting. Who knew crying made you so thirsty? Her face was terribly red and she felt like she could use a bath.

Benny followed her upstairs into her bedroom, he suddenly realized he’d never actually been on the second floor of the house. It looked a lot like the first floor, with its floral wallpaper and dusty blue furniture.

Beth immediately zipped down her black dress and tossed it onto a chair. She went into one of the drawers and slipped into an oversized t-shirt that fell just above her thighs and crawled into bed. Benny followed suit, pulling his black t-shirt over his head and unlatched his belt. The holster carrying his knife fell to the floor with a loud thud. Beth watched as he undressed and laid down next to her on the blue sheets. He brought his arm around her waist. Benny looked at her with calm eyes, like what had happened tonight was not a big deal, that it wasn't the most jarring night of their lives, and she wanted to kiss him for that, she wanted to kiss him so badly.

Beth looked at Benny’s pink lips, up to his eyes and back down. She grazed his nose with her own and kissed him tenderly at first, running a hand through his ruffled blonde hair. He tasted like cigarettes but she didn’t mind. Benny kissed her back, pulling her closer to his body, caressing her thigh with his hand, her skin felt soft and smooth compared to his own. Benny had been thinking about kissing Beth the moment he got into his Volkswagon to drive to Lexington, and he hadn’t stopped since. He pushed his tongue to meet hers and Beth let out a quiet whimper. She was so hungry for him.

Suddenly they were in a frenzy. Benny pulled away, pressing his lips into the crook of her neck, and sucking at her skin. She arched her back allowing him more access, her small hands grabbing at his shoulders. He licked, kissed, and sucked the supple skin making her gasp out. The sounds she made sent shivers down to his pelvis. Beth quickly turned them over so that she was straddling him. He sat up and crushed his mouth against her’s again, gripping her small waist and playing with the hem of her panty line. Beth felt like she was on fire, she needed him now. She reached down to unbutton his jeans but he quickly stopped her by the wrist.

“We can’t.” He panted out, “Believe me I want to. But not like this.”

He couldn’t, not after the night she just had. It wouldn’t be fair to Beth. Benny hadn't realized until tonight that Beth has been bleeding for a long time now, that maybe this was bigger than just an addiction. If he was going to sleep with her again, he wanted it to be done right. At first, he thought she’d be mad and kick him out of bed, but she didn’t. Beth only nodded and laid back down next to him. They stayed quiet for a moment, with Benny rubbing Beth’s shoulder as she rested her head on his chest and played with the chain of his necklace absentmindedly.

“You’re not a pawn.” Beth said.

“I know.”

She fell asleep shortly, and Benny looked up towards the ceiling, listening to her soft breathing. A cricket was chirping outside somewhere, and the occasional sound of a car driving past disturbed the shadows on the ceiling. Soon, Benny fell asleep too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHHH! It was so hard to write Beth's breakdown, I kept rewriting it a billion times trying to get it wrapped up in a pretty bow but then I realized that was impossible; break downs are meant to be messy and discombobulated, and I think that's what Beth and Benny need, to take down the walls and to just live in the mess for a second.
> 
> So in the next and final chapter, I promise that there will be a full love scene done right, the reason I didn't let it fully play into fruition in this chapter was that I felt like it would be a huge disservice to their building relationship. Benny wants Beth to get better and be happy, even if it means pushing down his own needs. But don't worry his needs will be meet lol These two deserve a night together after all the crap they've been through LOL
> 
> Again thank you so much for the kudos and comments, they bring me such joy and make my little heart sing!
> 
> *a direct quote from The Queen's Gambit Netflix mini-series, episode 5 titled 'Fork' directed and written by Scott Frank.


	5. Chapter 5

Back in New York, Benny was always the first one to wake up. He would make Beth coffee and bring it to her when she sat up from the little air mattress. But now Beth was awake first and she decided that she would do the same just as he’d did for her.

Beth stared at Benny’s bareback from across the bed, his white skin looked smooth and warm. She wanted to crawl closer to him and kiss his shoulder blades.

Beth tiptoed downstairs and put the coffee maker on. As she waited she stretched her arms up towards the ceiling and sighed. She hadn’t had a good night's rest in what felt like months. Beth felt different this morning, she didn’t know if it was from the lack of alcohol or tranquilizers in her system, her crying fit, or her reconciliation with Benny, but she felt good. The tightness in her chest had loosened, it wasn’t completely gone but it felt manageable.

Beth looked around the living room and suddenly found the dust and cobwebs unacceptable. The little blue ashtray was still peppered with cigarette studs and the couch needed a good whacking to get rid of the crumbs. Before her drinking days, Mrs. Wheatley would wake up bright and early and clean the house with precision. Everything was polished, dusted, and washed each day and she had taken pride in her work as a housewife. Beth remembered their first chess tournament trip to Cincinnati, and how when they arrived in their hotel room Mrs. Wheatley swiped a finger on every crook and cranny to check for dust. She would have had a fit if she found her house in this state. Beth smiled at the memories and went to the linen closet in the hallway and brought out the vacuum cleaner.

* * *

Benny climbed down the stairs with a yawn. It was a little chilly this morning and he suddenly yearned for his silk robe that he left back at home. As he came down the scent of freshly roasted coffee hit his nostrils and instantly he perked up.

“Ta-da!” Beth cried as Benny walked into the living room. The house was spotless. The piano sparkled and smelt of fresh lemon polish. The curtains were parted letting in sunlight. The cobwebs had disappeared and the musk scent of dust was gone. The floor was newly vacuumed and the crumbs on the furniture were gone.

Benny grinned at her and played along, “Wow!”

“Annnnnnd,” Beth sang as she disappeared into the kitchen.

She came back with two mugs of coffee. Hers with 3 cubes of sugar and a little cream, and Benny’s black. Back in New York Benny had lectured her about the significant quality of a black coffee, and every time she poured a little milk into her cup Benny would get all worked up about it. Sometimes she would do it just to annoy him. Benny chuckled and they clinked their mugs together in cheers. Beth went around the living room showing off her handy work to him. She was so cute, Benny thought. It was like when she had figured out a mistake Borgov made in one of his previous games, she had cried out, “Benny look!” like a little school girl showing her parents a drawing she made. It was nice seeing her like this after last night, relaxed and cheerful.

After they had finished their coffees and had breakfast, the pair set up a game of Chess in the living room and played until late afternoon. Beth had never coached anyone before, but she tried her best. She also found a lot of pleasure in correcting Benny’s moves and tactics to his annoyance, but he was willing to take it all in. Afterward, they headed out to the corner grocery store as Beth decided that she wanted to cook them dinner tonight. When they got back, Beth put a record on the phonograph and danced as she prepared dinner while Benny secretly snuck glances at her, although he was supposed to be studying for his chess tournament.

They sat across from each other at the dining room table, eating Beth’s homemade spaghetti from a can. Beth didn’t know how to cook, Mrs. Wheatley never taught her, and she spent the majority of her adult life eating out or having tv dinner trays. She had accidentally over boiled the pasta and the sauce was a little bland, but Benny didn’t seem to mind, he was already on his second serving so it couldn’t have been too bad. The sun was setting outside, giving the sky a nice pink hue. The phonograph was playing light music in the background as they sat together and ate.

“Besides your glorious victory in Moscow,” Benny said, “what else did you get up to?”

“I didn’t get to venture out as much as I wanted, the most I did was take walks or have lunch at a cafe.” Beth said between sips of water, “I did come across a park on my last day there. I played chess with a few elderly men who recognized me.”

Benny leaned forward, “Really? Did you go easy on them?”

“No of course not, I do have a reputation to maintain.” She teased.

“You probably broke a lot of old hearts. Man, I wish I could have seen that.”

“You should have been there.” Beth instantly regretted her choice of words. Benny was supposed to have gone with her but she screwed it up in favor of her pride. Things were finally good between them again, why was she bringing up an awkward memory for the both of them right now?

“You’re right, I should have.”

Beth flickered her eyes up at Benny but he was looking down at the table, nonchalant about his words. The moment Townes had called him at 10 pm at his apartment was the moment he was filled with regret. He remembered clutching his phone so tightly, his ring dug into his skin as he and the guys discussed and tested every possible move for hours. That was the only thing he could do. He should have been the one there; coaching, helping, and reminding Beth about who she is: The best fucking chess player there ever was.

“Well, maybe you can be there for the next one,” Beth said.

“I’m counting on it,” Benny challenged.

Beth tried to suppress her grin but failed, excitement bubbled into her stomach. Traveling with Benny would be a blast, that’s all she had imagined and hoped for when she flew into Moscow. They would run across airports to catch flights, play verbal chess in their seats and share cigarettes. Wherever they were it would be lively, they would go to local museums, art galleries, and little cafes. Study for their chess tournaments in their shared hotel room and make love at night. It would be them taking over the chess world together.

Suddenly Benny turned solemn, putting a hand underneath his chin and glancing over at Beth.

“Hey listen,” he said, “I need to start heading back tomorrow.”

“Why? I thought your tournament wasn’t for another two weeks.”

“It is, but I need to take care of a few things before I leave. I haven’t even bought my plane ticket yet.”

Beth frowned. He was leaving already? He just got here. Besides they’ve barely practiced for London. Not that he needed much, she knew Benny was going to win.

“Okay,” Was all she could say, keeping on a straight face.

Benny picked up their dirty plates and went to the kitchen to start washing them. Beth watched him as he went to the kitchen sink and grabbed the sponge. She felt bitterness in her mouth. It wasn’t fair, they had just resolved everything and now he was leaving. She didn’t want to go another month without seeing him, not again. Beth glanced at him as he washed the dishes. The glow of the kitchen light cast a shadow over his face sharpening his hard features, he looked so natural, washing dishes at her kitchen sink, it was almost like he belonged there.

If Benny had to leave fine, but she didn’t want it to end like this.

Benny felt Beth come up behind him, he was about to tell her not to worry about the dishes but she wrapped her arms around his waist and put her head against his back. He felt his heart skip a beat.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

Beth didn’t say anything, she slowly went on the tips of her toes and kissed his shoulder blade the way she wanted to this morning. Benny felt a fever pulsing in his skin, a blush forming across his cheek.

He turned around and Beth quickly brushed some of his hair away from his face. Her doe brown eyes looked into his dark ones, he’d never seen Beth look shy but it was written plainly on her face. But there was something else in her expression, desire and maybe even hope.

He bent down and kissed her before he could change his mind. She tasted sweet and familiar. He loved her taste, he could taste her all night if he could. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him, his back was pressed painfully against the kitchen counter but he didn’t care. Benny felt his muscles tense under his shirt, and his nostrils flared as Beth delved her tongue to meet his, gripping his hair in a tight fist. It was like he’d been deprived of water, and he was finally quenching his thirst. He needed her now. Benny pulled away, both of them breathing heavily. He wouldn’t be able to stop himself if they continued, he had to know for sure. They stared at each other. His dark eyes meeting her doe ones.

“Are you sure?” he asked.

Beth nodded her head quickly, “Yes.”

That’s all he needed. He was on her, crushing his mouth against her’s. God she was like a drug to him, he felt high on her scent. He loved how she affected him. He loved her mind, her body, her face, her power. He would do anything for Beth Harmon.

Beth suppressed a moan as he lifted her onto the counter, attacking her neck with bites, licks, and kisses. She wrapped her legs around his waist, panting as his hands trailed up and down her body. He felt so deliciously sweet against her, his rough hands running on her thighs, waist, stomach. With every touch, she felt heat pool down to her core and ignite something deep inside her. Benny always ignited something in her, whether it was hatred, annoyance, desire, or lust she felt it deep in her bones and she never wanted it to stop.

She reached down to unbutton her jeans, Benny helped her out of them and they fell to the ground with a loud slap. He bent down to kiss her stomach and waist, caressing her long milky legs. He smirked in between kisses, it had taken him everything to keep him from fondling her legs last night in bed, but now he didn’t have to. He pushed Beth’s legs apart and pulled her panties to the side, giving her folds a tentative lick. Beth gasped out with a moan, she was deliciously wet for him, and she tasted sweet like honey. Benny worked his mouth on her core and rubbed his thumb over the sensitive bundle of nerves. Beth felt like she was on fire, she fisted his hair and groaned with every touch he made. It sent chills through her. Benny watched her as he licked and kissed her core, she looked like a goddess with her long lashes fluttering, red hair draped over her blushing face. Every sound that escaped her pouty lips sent blood pumping down to his pelvis.

Suddenly Beth pulled Benny away by his shoulders, his dark eyes were dilated and he looked like he was starving for more.

“Let’s go upstairs.” She whispered.

Before he could respond Beth leaped from the counter and ran, flying past him. Benny chuckled and chased after her up the stairs. He quickly snatched her up before she reached the top step, and he lifted her up to his chest. Beth laughed as she wrapped her legs around him and kissed his neck as he carried her to the bedroom.

He gently laid her down on the bed, it was still unmade from this morning. Her bright red hair stood out like a beacon as it spilled over the tangled blue sheets. Benny tugged off Beth’s panties as she pulled her blouse and bra over her head. He hovered over her thin body and gave her breasts a gentle squeeze, cupping and massaging the twin pink buds.

“Fuck, Benny.” Beth mewled, throwing her head back. He took a bud in between his lips, sucking and nibbling until they peaked underneath his tongue. Beth cried out, dragging her nails across his shoulders and back. She arched her back, urging him to keep tasting her which he happily obliged.

She reached down to his belt and unbuckled it, kicking his pants and briefs with her feet. His holster fell to the ground with a loud thud, the sound vibrating in Beth’s stomach. Benny leaned back on his knees as she sat up, her hands running down his chest and towards his pelvis. She stroked his erection, he felt warm and hard in her grip, the tip already glistening with pre-cum.

He hissed at her touch, his jaw twitching. He had dreamed of Beth like this for weeks after she left him in New York. He had thought of her over and over again as he relieved himself at night, seeing her eyes as he released into his hand. He couldn’t believe she was with him now, touching and kissing him, she looked at him with such radiance he could barely hold it together.

Beth bent down and took him fully in the mouth, sucking and licking attentively the way he was with her. She wanted to make him feel the same things she was feeling, overwhelmed with lust and excitement. Benny made her feel things so strongly but it was almost impossible for her to form these emotions into words, Beth wasn’t raised that way, but Benny meant so much to her and she really needed for him to know that before he left. Her feelings almost overpowered her desire to harm herself with the little green pills and liquor bottles. She was never going to choose to drink over him ever again. He needed to know that too.

“God, Beth.” Benny moaned out and ran his fingers through her hair. Her mouth felt so warm and wet over his throbbing member. He clutched the sheets so tightly his knuckles drained white. Beth released him, a loud popping sound escaped as he left her dripping lips.

He pulled her down gently by the arm back into the ocean of blankets and pillows, hovering over her once again. He met her mouth with his in a hasty kiss, positioning himself between her legs. Beth let out a groan and tugged at his blonde hair as he slipped inside. They both sighed as ecstasy settled through their bodies. Benny started pumping into her, the sound of skin slapping against skin being their only music between pants and moans.

“Beth, you’re so tight.” Benny moaned out as he ground his hip into hers. Beth met his thrusts with her own, her legs tightening around his waist. She felt him everywhere, and she breathed that in like much needed air.

Benny flipped them over so that she was straddling him, and he watched as Beth rode his length through half-lidded eyes. She loved the way he watched her, it was the same look he gave her when he watched her play chess, with admiration and hunger. Harry and Tim never looked at her like that when they had sex, only burying their faces in her neck or pillow, but Benny looked into her eyes. Sweat beaded down their backs as they kissed, tasted, and touched one another.

Beth felt her peak getting closer as she ground her hips, “Benny-” she mewled out. She couldn’t hold much longer, the tight coil in her threatening to burst.

“Cum for me,” he said into her neck, “cum for me, Beth.”

His voice vibrated into her belly and with a final thrust Beth felt a wave of ecstasy wash through her, she arched her back and moaned as she released. Benny kept pumping into her, letting her ride out her orgasm. Hearing her cry out in euphoria sent Benny into a frenzy, he pumped rapidly into her dripping core until he too groaned in release.

They lied next to each other, panting heavily. Beth could hear the rapid beating of his heart as she lay on his chest, his hand cupping her rear. They were covered in sweat, scratches, and marks, reminders of where they had intimately touched one another. Benny felt the warm afterglow of her orgasm on her skin. He suddenly felt vulnerable.

“Can I ask you something?”

Beth turned to look at him, resting her chin on his chest, “I swear to God if you say anything about chess right now...”

Benny laughed and wiped the sweat from his forehead, “No. I mean not exactly-”

“Benny!”

“Just hear me out.”

Beth glared at him with a challenge. She felt like her heart was on wings, she would kick him off the bed right now if he ruined the moment.

“Come to London with me, Beth,” Benny said.

Beth’s eyes widened and she sat up quickly, clutching the blanket to cover her chest.

“What?”

Benny sat up too, “Look, I don’t know what exactly is going on between us, but what I do know is that I like it. I want this to turn into something, maybe not right away but eventually.” He intertwined his fingers into hers, staring down at their hands, “You make me feel something Beth. I hate not knowing what my next step is, I always have to have a strategy or plan but for some reason, you fuck my shit up. All my impulses are out of whack when it comes to you.” He peered up into her eyes, his expression filled with sincerity, “For the first time, I kind of like not knowing what the next step is. I want to be there with you in your next tournament, and I want you to be there for mine. So will you come to London with me?”

Beth felt her breath hitch, she suddenly felt scared. It was the same feeling she had when he called her from New York and told her that he missed her. What if she messed it up again? What if she wasn’t good enough? What if Benny realized later that she was too much for him? Beth knew that she pushed people away, any warmth she had ever received was quickly shut down, locked away forever. People leave. People change. People die. What was the point of loving someone when they would only end up being taken away?

She looked into his dark eyes, the usual hard features of his handsome face were softened, filled with openness. She realized that he was afraid too. Benny was right, it is frightening to not know what the next step is. It was like chess, your opponent won’t always follow your plan, so you have to be prepared to adapt. But sometimes you gain a better chance at winning when you do. All you can do is step into the unknown, and here was Benny stepping into the void. No one has ever done something like this for her before, not Mrs. Wheatley, Harry, or even Jolene. She could step into the unknown too.

“Okay,” she said.

Benny squeezed her hand reassuringly, a smile forming on his lips. Beth kissed him quickly, cupping the sides of his face. His mustache tickling her nose. They were so different from where they were a couple of months ago, they’d grown in that short amount of time. Sure, they still teased each other, Benny was still cynical and Beth was stubborn as ever but their fronts of protection were slowly coming down. They weren’t where they wanted to be yet but maybe being in that broken and terrifying state was what they needed.

Benny fell asleep before Beth did, he was holding her in a tight embrace and had his face buried into her back. She pulled the covers over themselves and listened to his breathing. She felt safe in his arms.

* * *

Benny started up the engine of his Volkswagen beetle, the hum of his car roared into life. It was 6 AM. The Lexington sky was a dusty orange as the sun was rising up around them, promising a summer hot day. Not a soul was outside; they were presumably still asleep in their warm beds, the streets were empty and only the occasional sound of bird song interrupted the silence.

Beth leaned against the window of the driver seat, her red hair was still messy from bed. Her pale skin was tinted pink in a blush. They had woken up tangled in the cotton blue sheets and made love again before Benny got ready to leave. 

“What are you going to get up to once I leave?” He asked. 

Beth yawned, “Probably go back to bed then head to the bank.” 

They had agreed to meet in New York next week and leave from there to England. As much as Benny wanted her to come back with him today she had to prepare for their trip and tend matters in Lexington before she left. He could survive a week without Beth Harmon. Maybe. 

“I’ll see you soon,” she said. Benny nodded and put the car into drive. 

Suddenly Beth placed a hand on his arm, “Thank you for coming to see me this week, and for helping me out. And for Moscow. And for New York. I don’t think I could have gone through all that without your help.” 

Benny smiled at her, shaking his head, “But you did Beth, that was all you. I was just there to remind you that you could.” 

Beth grinned back at him and kissed him longingly. He pulled out of the driveway, the sound of gravel cracking underneath the wheels. He gave her a quick wave before he drove away into the rising sunset. 

Beth watched until his car disappeared, feeling light and ready for anything. 

The End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so sorry this took so long! I got a new laptop so I had to transfer everything there and couldn't work on the final chapter. I also wanted this to end perfectly so I took a little more time than usual in writing this chapter.  
> Anyway, it is here! The final chapter! WAAA. OMG writing the scene was so difficult because I didn't want it to be too raunchy but I wanted it to be passionate at the same time. Gah.  
> Anyway, I just want to say thank you so much for all of your comments and kudos, it has meant a lot to me. I haven't written in so long and didn't think my writing was good enough but all the positive feedback has really encouraged me and I feel way more confident in my work now. So thank you from the bottom of my heart <3  
> I had a lot of fun writing this short fanfic and I hope I did the characters and stories justice!  
> Until next time, stay safe :)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, so this is the first fanfic I've ever posted on here. I haven't written in like, years so any feedback would be greatly appreciated! Let me know if you want me to continue this, I have a bunch of ideas.  
> I also am really not sure about the name for this fic so if you have any suggestions let me know :)  
> Also, I am so sorry for the formatting, I don't really know how to use the AO3 format so please bear with me until I get the hang of it.


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